Tag Archives: guilt
The metaphysical Spiritual Text “A Course in Miracles” The course teaches that all fear and suffering comes from investing in a learned identify, a false self that is invested in separation and pain. The truth of what we are actually has no identity with the physical body.
What we are is Love in its purest form. When we aren’t in alignment with that, we experience guilt (whether conscious or unconscious), pain and suffering. Everything we experience can be witnessed through fear which is never the truth, or Love which is always the truth. Everything in our life can be used to strengthen, our awareness of love. Our experiences can also be used to strengthen our investment in the false sense of self. My recent trip to the vet with my dog was a beautiful example of the contrast of the false identity and the stillness, the knowing that comes when we choose to rest in Love.
I have a beautiful dog, She is an absolute blessing in my daily life. She is a wonderful reminded of the present moment and the choice we all have control over. The choice to be happy no matter what appears to be going on. While it is true she doesn’t enjoy bath time, she doesn’t spend any time dwelling on past bathing mishaps, or anticipating future ones. Yes, she doesn’t like having baths (and she has a way of letting me know she disapproves), but when the time comes she accepts it for what it is, .Emily is a teacup Yorkie, full of joy and love. Every year I put money aside to have her teeth cleaned.
My vet has been telling me for the past several years that Yorkshire Terriers as a breed are known to have “bad teeth.” I’ve explored many alternatives over the years as options to care for her teeth. Before I had begun my journey working with angels and studying A Course In Miracles, Emily’s vet visits were a source of massive anxiety for me. Each time she went for her annual cleaning I would worry about the possibility of my sweet dog potentially losing teeth.
In September, Emily turned the earthy age of 8 (though her spirit is always youthful. On March 13th, she had her annual teeth cleaning. I asked the Angels to be with Emily throughout the checkup and cleaning, and I asked for the highest good to be done. I released everything to the care of God & I went about my day more relaxed then any previous appointments. Several hours later I received a call from the vet saying that Emily’s 6 tiny front teeth were diseased, and needed to be removed.
In my mind I immediately went to guilt. “What could I have done to prevent this?” “What could I have done to take better care of Emily?” “What could I have done to make it so she wasn’t facing this situation in the first place?” I even felt myself feeling defensive at some of the vet’s questions.
I’ll be honest, I felt very uncomfortable, and I was very aware of my discomfort since my spiritual practice has granted me so much peace, and a willingness to go with the flow of life in the awareness that my true identity is not what I see “out there” in terms of a body that experiences problems and conflict.
I wasn’t feeling peaceful when the vet called me though. I stayed feeling discomfort for several hours which felt very unusual. I am now much more comfortable aligned with Love, so anything that isn’t peace actually feels intolerable. During the vet experience I felt really guilty. A Course In Miracles teaches that “Guilt is always insane.” So, I chose to take that insanity and look at it with Spirit.
I know from working the principals of A Course In Miracles that discomfort only comes up to be observed with love. Observing something un-judgementally allows it be released and exchanged for true perception.
I wasn’t seeing myself with true perception while I was stuck in the guilt and the Self-blame. All I was seeing was the effects of my judgement. Once I was ready to look at my guilt and feel it n all of its ickiness I became open enough to embrace a miracle and be willing to accept a shift in perception.
I talked with Spirit and the Angels about everything I was feeling, my extreme discomfort, my bewilderment that this whole experience was bothering me so much.
I even looked at my frustration with myself for feeling so frustrated (LOL).
It was then that I received the intuitive message that Emily losing these teeth was an agreement that had already been made on a Soul level, there was never anything I could do to change anything that occurred, and by being willing to authentically look at what was coming forward, I was able to transform the entire experience from one full of fear, to one exploding with Love.
Once I was able to let go of the guilt, I was able to see and recognize so many other miracles that had occurred around the entire situation. I had been asking Spirit to look after everything for me, and Spirit had done just that, Emily was given tremendous loving care. Her vet bill invoice was printed at 1:11 which in Angel Numerology means “Your thoughts are manifesting, stay positive!”
Miraculously, the vet was inspired to remove several charges from the bill for Emily’s care as a gift. There is no doubt in my mind that God and the Angels were behind the gift of financial savings.
Emily is doing wonderfully, there was no ideal as far as she is concerned, to her, she hadn’t lot anything, and she has no attachment to those teeth whatsoever!
Emily taught me so much about an attachment I was hanging on to, and still placing belief into. I call her my “Little Angel Dog” and she truly is. She helped me look at areas where I wasn’t choosing for complete innocence. What a gift!
I’d love to hear from you, if this blog resonates with you. Feel free to share your personal experiences in the comments below!
For most of my life I believed saying no to someone was selfish, that somehow by saying no I wasn’t being spiritual or in the act of saying no I was giving up the chance to be of service to someone or something. This in turn lead to feelings of guilt, an endless spiral of blaming myself or feeling bad for something I’d perceived I’d done “wrong,” I worried endlessly that saying “no” somehow made me a bad person. Especially if energetically I felt that the other person expected or needed me to say yes. Then, I felt had no choice but to swallow my feelings and agree to what was being asked of me:
1) Because deep down I love helping people, it is so important to me to be of service to others.
2) Because I just couldn’t bear the thought of hurting or disappointing anyone – even people I didn’t know.
3) Because I was afraid to set boundaries. I wanted people to like and approve of me
I had heard people speak about “owning your power” constructively, but I think I was too polite and soft – too much of a people-pleaser
to understand the difference between stepping into assertive power with kindness versus being afraid of becoming hard, mean, bitter and abusive of my personal power when using it with other people.
In the last year, I have been on a deeply personal journey learning to accept myself for who I am, learning to embrace my psychic and intuitive gifts as part of my life purpose and my true calling. Each is a process including learning to be comfortable saying “no” to certain people or situations. I am learning that sometimes saying no is the most loving thing to be done. I’ve learned that I am not serving with pure intention and love if I say I will do something,, but deep down feel uncomfortable. That uncomfortable feeling is my intuition speaking up and telling me something doesn’t feel right.
Sometimes saying “no” is an act of self-care, and your intuition will tell you the difference between whether it is time to walk away from a situation completely versus whether it is simply time for you to stay the course, face your fear step out of your comfort zone. If you take the time to sit and stillness and get in touch with your genuine feelings, the answer will come to you. I recently had an opportunity where I needed to say no. It wasn’t an easy decision because I haven’t said no to many things personally or professionally. This particular situation gave me the unmistakable message I needed to walk away. My personal energy was depleted, I didn’t feel positive about the project in question, I wasn’t being treated with respect, and ultimately the clients highest good wasn’t being served the way things stood. Saying no in this case was an act of love, done in the best interest of all with kindness and compassion.
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